Look Yourself in the Eye
by I heart the Hitachiin twins
Summary: A fight between Bon and Rin turns into something a little more dramatic. No slash.


**Hi! For all of you who followed this here hoping for You Did This or Entering The Mind Of An Unsuspecting Halfa, sorry! Danny's fighting me a bit, but I had to give you something for Christmas!**

**I'll be out of town for a few weeks, so don't expect updates anytime soon. D:**

**Clearly this is after the reveal.**

**BTW: I call him Bon, okay? I can barely remember his real name, let alone spell it!**

**I don't own Blue Exorcist**

It had started out so normally, just another cram school session. However, in a desperate attempt to make it up to his brother for messing up so badly as he put it, Rin had stayed up until midnight finishing the mountains of homework his multiple teachers had assigned, including his little brother himself. He had finished eventually, but then had been forced to stay up even later and help Ukobach prepare the lunches for the next day. This had caused the poor halfling to sink into a less than stellar mood despite his usual cheery personality, and of course there was no sympathy from the well rested Yukio the next morning, it was up at six and off to school. Stupid Yukio with his busy schedule, but he knew that if his little brother left without him Rin would sleep 'till noon. So it was up and out the door.

He was the last to the lesson, thankfully Yukio hadn't turned up yet. Rin hastily took his seat. Bon was showing off his latest piercing, because for some reason the stupid rooster felt he needed more of the stupid things. Konekomaru was standing in the background as Shima talked to Bon avidly. It was all well and good, until the two began to argue if Bon looked odd because his piercings weren't symmetrical anymore. It was a pointless, friendly, _loud_ argument, and Rin was at his limit. The talking was giving him a _killer_ headache and it was so pointless! "DOES IT _MATTER!" _Rin yelled at the top of his lungs, a mistake as it only made the headache worse but if felt fantastic to blow off some steam so he kept going. "You look stupid either way, so what's the difference?"

Bon's fece reddened and he got to his feet "Oh yeah, and I suppose you're the most fashionable person in all of history." He replied heatedly.

"No, but at least I'm not so insecure about my appearance I go about _editing_ my body." Rin replied, pouring pure spite into the word "editing".

"Yeah, you don't need to!" Bon yelled, forgetting to avoid the sensitive topic of Rin's heritage in his fit of rage. "Only freaks get their bodies adapted to look like yours, and for you the look's natural! You want to see something unnatural? Look in the mirror!"

Rin didn't have a retort to that. Usually he would just shrug it off, but today… His headache, the tiredness, the struggle of his school life, the constant weighing guilt of what happened in the church that night, his demonic side that haunted him on a daily basis, stress, fear of rejection… Everything he had pent up for months and months on end. Every negative emotion, every time he blamed himself, every insecurity, came pouring out in the form of angry words and little amounts of boiling blue fire.

"IT MAKES ME A _FREAK," _Rin yelled angrily at the other exwire "THE BIGGEST ONE EVER! BUT DO YOU THINK I LIKE IT? DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE BEING LIKE THIS? NO! OF COURSE YOU DON'T! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE HATED AND SHUNNED AND TO CONSTANTLY HAVE THE WHOLE WORLD HATE YOU FOR WHAT YOU WERE _BORN_ AS! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS TO HAVE NO ONE LIKE YOU, FOR YOUR OWN TO BE AGAINST YOU, EVEN YUKIO TOLD ME TO JUST LAY DOWN AND DIE AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO SERIOUSLY WANT TO! YOU TELL ME TO LOOK IN THE MIRROR, BUT I DO, EVERYDAY, AND I _CANT LOOK MYSELF IN THE EYE!_"

Rin finished his angry rant with a heavy huff and the flames vanished before they could do any damage. With that, he turned and fled, pushing past Yukio, who had been standing in the doorway the whole time, and taking off. Sprinting down the halls and out of the building. Running straight past the dorms where he and Yukio slept, out of the school grounds and into the city. He ran and ran and ran, trying to escape all his problems and take back the last half hour, but that was futile. Eventually he collapsed in a narrow alleyway where his fatigue finally caught up with him, letting out one last heavy pant, he collapsed and passed out.

**Line Break**

Back at the classroom, no one had moved a muscle. It was as if the room's occupants were afraid to speak move or even breathe lest it tear a hole in the air that felt so thick you could cut it like butter. Eventually Yukio snapped out of his daze and strode up to Bon, his calm demeanour overshadowing a dark and threatening aura that had the exwires in edge."What did you do?" He asked, his tone bordering on malicious. Shock allowed Bon to come to his senses.

"What did I do? I'm not the one who just flipped out and started spouting nonsense and blue flames! Besides, he started it." Bon sputtered.

"Yes," Yukio replied, "But Rin wouldn't have either unless you gave him a reason. Sure my brother's hot headed, but even he doesn't explode like that for no reason. You must have said something, what was it?

Bon growled inwardly. "Does it matter? Just go get him." He muttered and watched his teacher leave the room.

Half an hour passed and Yukio was yet to return. "Does anyone have either of their numbers?" Konekomaru asked.

"Only Yukio's." Shiemi replied and sent some quick texts.

'What happened?'

'Are you okay?'

'Where are you?'

It was a few seconds before he answered with one, short, terrifyingly simple line of text.

'I can't find him.'

**Line Break**

All the exwires got to the dorms where the Okumura brothers stayed just before it bagan to rain. Sheimi called Yukio again, but he didn't answer. They all split up and hurried through the halls of the annoyingly large building, looking for either of the twins. Nothing. About ten minutes later they gathered in a large hallway. After a little discussing they realised no one had actually checked this hall and opened the nearest door. Inside, they found Yukio who had turned into a nervous wreck over the last forty minutes. He was leaning against a messy bed with blue sheets that was clearly Rin's. Choked sobs forced themselves out of his throat. Yukio despised himself for showing such weakness in front of his students, but he couldn't help it. He wanted his big brother to walk through those doors with a goofy grin on his face and comfort him like he did when they were kids, before all this demon nonsense even started.

Sheimi moved closer to the distraught male, but he moved away. "What do I do?" He muttered sadly, "I became an exorcist to protect him but I can't even do that! He's not answering his phone, he's not in the building, he's not even on the roof! What- what if he left the grounds? What if he got attacked? What if he doesn't come ba-" He cut off abruptly as Bon slapped him across the face. Surprised, Yukio reached up and touched the sore area softly with his fingers. "Shut up!" Bon growled.

Bon wasn't sure why he had slapped the younger male. Perhaps it was because seeing the usually stoic teen in such a state was unsettling, maybe he just didn't want to hear the hysterical prattle any more, who knows? But the deed was done, and it was effective. "Shut up." He repeated. "Why are you getting so worked up? We'll find him, the only thing slowing us down is your pointless worrying!" Yukio stood silently and shook his head.

"You're right, of corse you're right. Let's go." And with that, the group left the building and headed into the rain.

**Line Break**

Even though the storm had passed, it had taken them three hours to locate Rin, and it had been completely by chance. Bon had seen something move while passing a deserted alleyway, which upon closer inspection, was not so deserted. Rin was still unconscious and had become sodden with the rain water that had practically flooded the streets. One phone call later and the entire team had arrived and were on the way back to the school.

Yukio was relieved beyond words when they finally got Rin back. When that idiot woke up he would get the lecture of his _life_, but for now… "Oh Nii-san…" He sighed as he looked his brother over. He honestly had no clue what his brother was going through, and he hated it. Why couldn't Rin just _tell _him when he was upset rather than bottling it up until something like _this _happens? He sighed again and sat down at his desk, pulling out some work to do while he waited.

When Rin woke up, he woke up in his bed, which was weird. Hadn't he passed out in the city? Oh well. He pulled himself to his feet and headed over to the bathroom, he turned the shower on as hot as it could go, but a little voice at the back of his head whispered, _Gotta leave some hot water for Yukio._ Yukio, where was that spotty four-eyes anyway? An answer came in the form of a body pressed against his as soon as he left the bathroom. He wrapped his arms around Yukio, because of corse it was he, and braced himself. "NII-SAN! That was very very irresponsible! You _know _what could have happened!" He scolded. Rin sighed, but he totally deserved it, so he didn't complain, although the angry aura pouring off his brother was enough to make him shiver. He would totally pay for that later.

**Line Break**

A few days later, Bon came into the cram school with a small hand mirror. "What's that for, preening?" Rin taunted friendlily.

"Nope, you." He replied, "You're getting over this, now." He dumped the mirror on the desk and stood behind him expectantly. Rin didn't say anything, he looked at the small, innocent looking mirror that could hold so much evil and gulped. He reached forward and picked up the item, angling it so it reflected his face. He looked into the mirror and tried to look into the azure pools, but he just couldn't. His gaze dropped shamefully. Just then, he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, he followed the arm it was attached to, to find his little brother and all the other exwires behind him, smiling at him.

He took a deep breath and looked at the mirror once again, this time he looked straight into his own eyes and was pleasantly surprised.

They were just as human as they were before.

**Merry Christmas! And happy Birthday in advance you two goofballs!**


End file.
